Tag: flying

Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs On My Own Red, Soldiers, & Fire Yellow, Gold, Kings, Fathers, and the Sun

Fly Away

I’ve been recording a lot of music and I don’t have the time or work ethic to create artwork for it all so it leaves me with the question…. use AI art or take random photos of my apartment?

AI art is a decent choice aesthetically but I don’t use any AI in my music, or writing for that matter, and it would make me feel sick if people thought it was an AI creation, generated by the click of a button, when in reality I’m slaving away away surrounded by black wires…

And fwiw the beautiful brand new PlushMellow in this photo is available for adoption. A $20 adoption fee includes shipping. One of my first gigs when I was desperately trying to survive was finding good homes for stuffed animals. I’ve learned I have to think bigger to make it in this world but I still need to find homes for the few I have left.

Fly away in a little bit
Fly away in a cloud of strings
Like the sun on an icicle
You found your pair of wings.

When the time wasn’t over yet
When the time was ready to begin
When my heart was red lying in a box
Waiting for the sticking pin.

There you go, I know your eyes
Fire with a flash of pain
Feel it burn, feel it end
What is the name of this thing that remains?

Fly away in a little bit
Fly away in a cloud of strings
Like the sun on an icicle
You found your pair of wings.

There you go, the hand that wears the glove of velvet red
Like a woman, like a child, is the man afraid of his own death
Like a woman, like a child- the man who will never fight
Flickering beneath the sky and dying that same night.

Fly away in a little bit
Fly away in a cloud of strings
Like the sun on an icicle
You found your pair of wings.

There you go, the man I know whose legs are far too thin
Find the box and open it to push your stick pin in
Fire I know, death I know, I also know your eyes
Like a woman, like a child- the man who never lies.

Fly away in a little bit
Fly away in a cloud of strings
Like the sun on an icicle
You found your pair of wings.

Fly Away Download

Tags blood, box, flying, pain, red, velvet

Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs On My Own Red, Soldiers, & Fire

Please Don’t Hurt Me

Okay this is a song. I hope it sounds like one but I am too nervous to listen because this is my first attempt recording by myself which I have to do since I moved out on my own which is very sad and scary but by the end James was just screaming at me all the time that he was terrified of me and I was a psychopath and I made it so his brain didn’t work and he needed me gone so he could think and I didn’t really know what to do so finally I did what he wanted, just like I always did, and left.

I was already enrolled in a program through the women’s shelter to be placed somewhere so they are paying my rent for the first year. If it wasn’t for that I don’t know what I would have done. I don’t understand what is going on with James, if he is suffering from something or messing with me, but by the end restrictions had become so severe that it was a feat to accommodate him. I started to take pride in my ability to contort into more and more ridiculous positions.

The rules went from not being allowed to ask questions to not being allowed to speak. At all. Because one word from me could be so disruptive to his brain that he would be compelled to stay in bed for three weeks recovering and missing important meetings.

But the more I was expected to stay perfectly silent & calm the more he would amp up the behaviors most likely to upset me and make them more and more obvious, such as his romantic interactions with other women. By the end, I just accepted this and remained unmoved. It was the only option left.

And he was still allowed to speak of course, since he was not the terrifying psychopathic one. Every day he would unleash on me multiple times about how I had ruined his life, stopped his brain from working, lost him a billion dollars that very day etc. By the end, not talking & silently accepting everything was no longer good enough because by then my very presence threw him into a state of terror.

I moved out close to 2 weeks ago and at first just felt extremely sad about losing this perfect love. But as time moves on I am starting to see other things that make me feel other feelings. Like fear. At home I was not allowed to be afraid of him. Because I was the terrifying one.

Setting up the kitchen in my new home. I really hope this works out. I have to admit I felt much safer with James at the wheel.

Please don’t hurt me.
Please don’t let them do me harm.
If they try let them die
By your arm.

Please don’t let them touch what’s mine.
Please no sneaking behind my back.
And all the treasures they defile
Bring them back.

Let me fly God let me fly
Let me watch the world below.
Blood is flowing in the streets
Let it flow, let it flow.

Let me see God let me see
Give me eyes on every side
And when they come again for me God
Let them die.

Always thought your way was love, I never knew a thing.
God is not sweet words, a smile, a home, a diamond ring.
God is not the man who stands by you when you kneel down to pray.
He only stands behind you when you slay.

You wanted me to rise and sing
You wanted me so tall
To kick and spit and elbow when they had me gainst the wall.

You wanted me to scream and curse
And bite them in the dick
And not to care what other people think.

If God lives he lives through us
so rise up from your bed.
And let him place the crown upon your head.

Please Don’t Hurt Me Download

Tags blood, death, flying, god

Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Sky Blue, Ether, Flags, and Fairies

Only Blue

Post author By julien
Post date June 7, 2022
No Comments on Only Blue

First the sound of laughing.
Life is all around. I lie.
Close my eyes again and I
Feel it falling down. I fly.

I can see behind me.
I see you.
I remember then when you
Were my only blue.

All the waves come crashing
To my mind that’s how it goes.
I was stationed like a pool.
You were free to go.

Falling down into me
Now I can’t explain why I’m
Reaching out to touch your face
Touch me back and then I fly.

Hover in the air to watch you there.
You were getting bored the more that I tried.
And my arms blew all around you like a storm and nothing more.
You stayed inside.

Raining down again I try
To remember all you said.
But the pieces never fit
Piling up inside my head.

Close my eyes again and I
I see you.
Take me back again to when
You’re my only blue.

Only Blue Download

Would you care to donate a dime or one dollar? All mini contributions are greatly appreciated.

Tags Air, blue, flying, ocean, rain, Water

Charleston, West Virginia Earth, Pink, Mothers, Love Music & Songs

Clay where you were born

In my mind you walk beside me in the sun
Standing like a fire between myself and everyone.
Hold me in your arms I feel the yellow falling down.
You are my ground.

Brown. Orange. Packed. Worn.
Product of the clay where you were born.

Then one day you push me and I‘m falling back.
Rolling over, over down into the black.
Open up my eyes to find a world of liquid blue.
Where are you?
There’s no ground.

Spinning now. Spinning around.
Grasping for whatever seems to be the ground.
Unknown. Scorned.
Tossed away from clay you were born.

One day I will find my way to solid shore.
Fingers sinking into mud scared no more
Sinking into earth is where the body can renew.
My earth is you.

Strong. Sad. Sometimes crazy sometimes mad.
Fighting one day overcome and soar
Far away from clay where you were born.

Clay where you were born Download

Tags brown, Earth, flying, orange, Water

Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Plants and the Emerald Kingdom Sky Blue, Ether, Flags, and Fairies Videos

The Window (video)

They say the rain will play that song again
You know the way it will go.
To feel his net within my mind again
I’ll lead the way even so.

But if you’re gonna take a one time stand, then you’re a one time man
You don’t know the way.
If you want to say that they was wrong when they was barely born
Save it for another day.

If you want to take the easy way and fly
First you’ll walk towards the window by my side-
Water running through the drain and
Everything remains the same and

If you want to find the open road and go
First you’ll walk towards the window then you’ll know-
Clouds are foaming in the blue, man.
Do you think that they’re reforming you man?

I feel the baker take her time again
Stir slow, stir slow all of the corn.
Green fields appear within my mind again
Grow slow, grow slow, only born.

But if you’re gonna take a one time stand, then you’re a one time man
You don’t know the way.
If you want to say that they was wrong when they was barely born
Save it for another day.

If you want to take the easy way and fly
First you’ll walk towards the window by my side-
Water running through the drain and
Everything remains the same and

If you want to find the open road and go
First you’ll walk towards the window then you’ll know-
Clouds are foaming in the blue, man.
Do you think that they’re reforming you man?

You know the way to pull that cold from me
Pull hard, pull hard, pull with your hand.
My hair was rope inside your hand, you see
Pull hard, pull hard see if you can.

But if you’re gonna take a one time stand, then you’re a one time man
You don’t know the way.
If you want to say that they was wrong when they was barely born
Save it for another day.

If you want to take the easy way and fly
First you’ll walk towards the window by my side-
Water running through the drain and
Everything remains the same and

If you want to find the open road and go
First you’ll walk towards the window then you’ll know-
Clouds are foaming in the blue, man.
Do you think that they’re reforming you man?

Tags blue, clouds, flying, green, men, rain, roads, time, wind

Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Uncategorized Yellow, Gold, Kings, Fathers, and the Sun

The Bird King

This song was from a dream. Mostly at the moment I only write songs when I hear them in dreams which can be annoying because I don’t always want to wake up. But I usually do, just in case there is some meaning behind it.

A bigger problem though is that dream songs have some added dimension that can’t be captured…. kind of like they are being sung from all directions at once- or there is some kind of harmony but not any harmony that can be replicated…. it is just like there is an additional dimension somehow that creates a feeling of infinite spaciousness, but when you wake up that dimension is gone & all you can write down are the melody and words. I suppose you could try to replicate that other quality with a children’s choir & orchestra, but I am lactose intolerant.

Take a step into the silence
Smell the air- the scent of violence
To close your eyes & tell us all what you see.

A single bird on the tallest tree now
From all directions a harmony
Somehow I know- we must follow his lead.

‘Yes I flew up to the tallest tree
O do you see me there? Hellow it’s me-
I have been watching you
I am the reason you cried.

I alone am the crown of kings
I am the god of birds and little things
You oughtta know by now
I’ll be the reason you die.

I fell down.
I was saved.
I was thrown.
In a pauper’s grave.’

Wading now into the water
Oh my god, are you my father?
A little boy crying there at your feet.

The waters clear & the pictures come now
From all directions the boys will drum now
A sea of men blowing into the creek.

‘Look again into the tallest tree
And you will see me there- bow to me
I have been watching you
I am the reason you cried.

I alone am the crown of kings
I am the god of birds and little things
You oughtta know by now
I’ll be the reason you fly.

I fell down.
I was saved.
I was thrown.
In a pauper’s grave.

The Bird King Download

Tags birds, death, flying, Kings, mass graves, war, Water

Blue, Black, Silver, Water, Moons, Death & Ghosts Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Sky Blue, Ether, Flags, and Fairies Uncategorized

The Window

Post author By julien
Post date June 7, 2020
No Comments on The Window

They say the rain will play that song again
You know the way it will go.
To feel his net within my mind again
I’ll lead the way even so.

If you’re gonna take a one time stand, then you’re a one time man
You don’t know the way
If you want to say that they were wrong when they were barely born
Save it for another day.

If you want to take the easy way and fly
First you’ll walk towards the window by my side
Water flowing through the drain and
Everything remains the same and

If you want to find the open road and go
First you’ll walk towards the window then you’ll know
Clouds are foaming in the blue and
Do you think that they’re reforming you man?

I feel the baker take her time again
Stir slow, stir slow all of the corn.
Green field appear within my mind again
Grow slow, grow slow, only born.

If you wanna take a one time stand, then you’re a one time man
You don’t know the way.
If you wanna say that they were wrong, when they were barely born
Save it for another day.

If you want to take the easy way and fly
First you’ll walk towards the window by my side
Water flowing through the drain and
Everything remains the same and

If you want to find the open road and go
First you’ll walk towards the window and you’ll know
Clouds are foaming in the blue and
Do you think that they’re reforming you man?

You know the way to pull that cold from me
Pull hard, pull hard, pull with your hand.
My hair was rope inside your hand, you see
Pull hard, pull hard see if you can.

If you wanna take a one time stand, then you’re a one time man
You don’t know the way.
If you wanna say that they were wrong, when they were barely born
Save it for another day.

If you want to take the easy way and fly
First you walk towards the window by my side
Water flowing through the drain and
Everything remains the same an

If you want to find the open road and go
First you’ll walk towards the window and you’ll know
Clouds are foaming in the blue and
Do you think that they’re reforming you man?

Download MP3: The Window

Tags clouds, Corn, flying, music, rain, Water

Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Purple, Magic & Sorcerers Sky Blue, Ether, Flags, and Fairies Videos

Threes (Video)

Sometimes I have words to explain things & other times I don’t. This past week I was trying to expose myself to as much yellow as possible in the hopes that it would give me more practical forms of intelligence, but I don’t think it worked. I sat for long periods in front of a yellow light & afterwards just found that all the words had been knocked out of me. I’m not sure why. Probably just because yellow is so different from what I normally think about that I couldn’t make heads or tails of it.

So that is my excuse for not being able to give you any meaningful explanations for this song. Really though, it might have more to do with the nature of the song and not so much to do with yellow.

Hold me by the wrist.
Hold me to the ground.
Watch the world it flies
Spinning round and round.

Tell me what you know.
Tell me everything.
Pressed into a box.
Pressed into a ring.

See clouds that fly.
See them flying free.
That third one is I-
Do you recognize me now?

Their reflections fly
Flowing down the stream
Round my ankles I
Need you to release me now.

In the mirror there,
I saw you again
Like a foggy man
Close behind me then

Pressing into me
Your two hands were tied.
We’re in this world now
Like the square it binds.

Catch a bird that flies
Slice him into three.
Like a man he dies-
Do you understand me now?

Capture any bird
Capture anything
The relentless claw-
Do you understand me now?

When I heard your words
They were only sounds
Tying up my brain
Filling it with brown.

And my heart was tied
Like an animal too.
Our words weren’t the same
How could I explain to you?

Something isn’t right.
Something spinning wrong.
Shapes are scratching now.
Not where I belong.

Every cloud that flies
Breaking up in threes
Meaning something dies
Will you recognize me now?

Tags birds, box, clouds, flying, fog, hands, mirrors, rings

Charleston, West Virginia Music & Songs Purple, Magic & Sorcerers Sky Blue, Ether, Flags, and Fairies Uncategorized

Threes

Post author By julien
Post date August 1, 2019
1 Comment on Threes