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Dreamcatcher

Dreamcatcher of the night
Look at what I’ve done.
I’m in a bad way now.

He told me no more fight
No more hide & run
Hold it inside somehow.

How?

Touch me on the arm again with all your little strings, your little strings,
oh god
I can feel them coming now with all their little wings, their little wings
And they tell me that someone is on my side.

I did it. Spit it out.
Pin me by the neck.
Didn’t obey his will.

Soft voices. Close my eyes.
I know what I get.
Reach for another pill.

Uphill.

Come onto my head again with all your little strings, your little strings,
oh god
I can feel them coming now with all their golden wings, their golden wings
And they tell me that someone is on my side.

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Charleston, West Virginia Politics Writings

In Praise of Communism

Communism cannot be defeated. It represents important truths and until capitalism wrestles with these and incorporates them into a broader capitalist vision the desire for communism will not go away. These truths include interdependence and the realization that power does not equal value. In other words, survival of the fittest does not mean survival of the best.

Supporters of capitalism champion values such as self-reliance and competition. Both beautiful things. But this frequently morphs into the naive view that whoever wins a competition was in fact superior and has more to offer society than those he vanquished.

A 60 second reflection on life will show this is not the case. Those who survive may be best at surviving, but this does not mean they contribute more to society. If baby Jesus were to be defeated by the AIDS virus, that is natural selection, but can we truly say the cream has risen to the top? Likewise, the winner of a business competition may have been best at winning the competition, but that is no guarantee they offer more value or a better product than those they beat out. Were the Mongols inherantly superior to those they destroyed? No. Might does not make right and might has little correlation to value.

But those with a religious belief in capitalism frequently cling to the notion that that which does survive and thrive is that which SHOULD survive and thrive, conveniently blocking from their minds the truth that evil is frequently well versed in survival. But this naive capitalist dogma relieves us of the human responsibility to ENSURE the survival of the good by throwing our weight behind it. We can sit on our hands and watch gladiators behead children while mumbling something about Darwin under our breaths. If people do not feel a moral responsibility to see that good triumphs, capitalism will create nothing more than a cesspool of oppression.

Allowing life to take its course is not evolution. Evolution is taking responsibility for what happens in our world. Might makes right leads to de-evolution.

The principle of self-reliance can also be troubling. On the one hand, it is a beautiful thing when people take responsibility for their own survival. On the other hand, most people who consider themselves ‘self-reliant’ pay little attention to all the people and systems which make their self-reliance possible. Then, when they see someone else struggling to survive, they make the naive assumption that a lack of self-reliance must be the problem.

Yet again, a 60 second reflection easily reveals the complicated truth that many (most?) human problems are external in nature. Slavery and systems which create functional enslavement being just two examples. As far as we know, the animals in the zoo are every bit as self-reliant- or would be anyways- as animals in the wild. To attribute the struggles of others to their inferior moral characters is simply a fantasy which relieves us of guilt as we prioritize the most trivial pleasures for ourselves over the basic needs of others. Because if we were to help them, they would never learn self-reliance, now would they?

There is also the brain-dead conflation of poverty with laziness. While this may be true in some cases, the reality is simple. Our wealth is determined by a single factor- how much money we have received from others. Lazy people frequently position themselves to receive quite a bit of money. Hardworking people can also position themselves to receive good money from their labor. Or hardworking people can find themselves in situations where they receive little or no rewards- in some cases even ending up in debt from nonstop work.

But it is always the case that wealth is simply a measure of what we have received. Never a measure of what we have given. Hardworking people all over the world can barely feed their children. In many cases the poor are the most hardworking segment of society. We call them the labor class. They are contributing but aren’t positioned to receive wealth- either through their own lack of skill in RECEIVING or an actual lack of options. In astrology, for example, the sign that rules work- Virgo- is associated with poverty. Virgo focuses constantly on solving the problems of those around him and is rewarded with scorn. A pattern we have all witnessed.

So this is yet another problem with religious capitalism- we measure people’s value by how much they have received from society, not how much they have given to it. We convince ourselves that these are one and the same. This relieves us of guilt & casts our fawning admiration towards the rich in a more flattering light. We admire their contributions. We aren’t sniveling syncophants drawn to power like a moth to hell.

So while I am fully team capitalism, I embrace it as an economic system- NOT a religious philosophy. Capitalism will never ensure the cream rises to the top. It is does not magically cause good to triumph over evil. That is OUR job. If we sit on our fat asses and watch humanity slug it out in a gladiator pit just waiting to suck the dick of the winner we will create a hell on earth. Cause you know who the winner will be. Satan. When capitalism is used as an excuse to free ourselves of moral responsibility, that is just the way things go.

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The Window (video)

They say the rain will play that song again
You know the way it will go.
To feel his net within my mind again
I’ll lead the way even so.

But if you’re gonna take a one time stand, then you’re a one time man
You don’t know the way.
If you want to say that they was wrong when they was barely born
Save it for another day.

If you want to take the easy way and fly
First you’ll walk towards the window by my side-
Water running through the drain and
Everything remains the same and

If you want to find the open road and go
First you’ll walk towards the window then you’ll know-
Clouds are foaming in the blue, man.
Do you think that they’re reforming you man?

I feel the baker take her time again
Stir slow, stir slow all of the corn.
Green fields appear within my mind again
Grow slow, grow slow, only born.

But if you’re gonna take a one time stand, then you’re a one time man
You don’t know the way.
If you want to say that they was wrong when they was barely born
Save it for another day.

If you want to take the easy way and fly
First you’ll walk towards the window by my side-
Water running through the drain and
Everything remains the same and

If you want to find the open road and go
First you’ll walk towards the window then you’ll know-
Clouds are foaming in the blue, man.
Do you think that they’re reforming you man?

You know the way to pull that cold from me
Pull hard, pull hard, pull with your hand.
My hair was rope inside your hand, you see
Pull hard, pull hard see if you can.

But if you’re gonna take a one time stand, then you’re a one time man
You don’t know the way.
If you want to say that they was wrong when they was barely born
Save it for another day.

If you want to take the easy way and fly
First you’ll walk towards the window by my side-
Water running through the drain and
Everything remains the same and

If you want to find the open road and go
First you’ll walk towards the window then you’ll know-
Clouds are foaming in the blue, man.
Do you think that they’re reforming you man?

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Charleston, West Virginia men Writings

Submission

Here is my feeling on submitting to your husband- it is inevitable. Wills are made of iron & men have more iron than women.

Still, it annoys me when submission is made into a moral accomplishment. Is falling down the stairs an accomplishment? What about riding down a mountain in a grocery cart? I don’t see anything particularly noble about yielding to someone else. It is more a practical choice.

I don’t like it to be sugar coated either. The happy submissive wife holding a tray of cookies. In real life, submission is an extreme sport. Like surfing. Giant waves come at you and there is nothing you can do to change them, just learn how to not get knocked down. Maybe there is value in living that way.

I recently read the autobiography of Bin Laden’s wife and couldn’t believe how much her life resembled mine. She must follow her husband around and not ask questions. When he comes he comes, when he goes he goes. Things blow up and she isn’t supposed to cry. He moves her to a frozen mountain top with no water or electricity and she doesn’t complain. Only once does she make a request from him- that he spend more time with his boys. He complies by encouraging them to become suicide bombers.

What resonates with me most about all this is that conservative propaganda leads people to believe you submit to your husband in exchange for security. False! There is little security in it. For Bin Laden’s wife, machine guns, bombs & grenades were everywhere. Even if your husband doesn’t lead a militia, full dependence puts you in a precarious position. If he leaves you or you leave him, you are doomed. Yet the odds are over 50% this will happen. If he goes insane you are also doomed. The odds are probably high for this as well. I recently took a poll of women asking what percentage of men- that they have known behind closed doors- were decent & the response averaged out to around 5%. So the probability of dependency meaning security plus home sweet home cookie platters is somewhere around 2%*. And you have little control over whether you end up in this 2% or not. From what I can tell, men are like movies. We can watch them but not impact what happens on the screen. Following a man’s will is not for the faint of heart.

Men seem to think women are obsessed with empowerment and proving they can do what a man can do. But I don’t know any women like this. So called “empowerment” usually serves the more humble purpose of not dying & ensuring your kids survive as well. I imagine most women would prefer decorating cookies for their loving husband to working in a sausage factory making ends meet. They just aren’t in the mood to play russian roulette when the odds are 98% not in their favor.

And it is really really hard to be both the empowered woman and the not-empowered woman at the same time. To devote oneself to home, wife & motherhood while also having a high-powered law career to fall back on.

There are definitely advantages to being a traditional obedient wife. You lose one type of freedom but gain another. The freedom of not having the spend the majority of your energy making a living. This allows you to devote yourself to what you find most meaningful. Maybe you will raise kids. Maybe you will learn to fly. I don’t think being a submissive/dependent wife is a bad option. But it troubles me that the cultural forces which promote it are the same one’s unwilling to acknowledge its true risks & challenges. Conservatives say things like “ a woman can’t be abused unless she wants to cause otherwise she would leave.” Well, how do they figure that? How does a person with no access to resources or survival skills just walk out the door?

This is why conservatives annoy me even though I am one. They are not realistic at all when it comes to women. They love to say that women abuse men just as much as men abuse women. But how exactly? Normally they fall back on the idea that women must be doing some super subtle form of invisible evil which ends up being the exact equivalent to all the dastardly deeds men quite obviously perform in the world. I don’t believe this at all. At the risk of giving someone a hernia, I do believe men are more “bad” than women. Because the masculine principle relates to power. The feminine principle relates to love. There is a reason the taliban is male. It’s not a coincidence.

So what is the solution? I don’t know. Submit to your husband or to your boss at the sausage plant. Her choice. Personally, I avoid the smell of sausage at all costs.

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Astrology Charleston, West Virginia Writings

Uranus & Saturn- Progress & Regress

Some people are so dumb they think time always runs forward. But in astrology time is various forces running in an eternal circle. The passage of time could make you old. Or it could make you young. It all depends on whether Jupiter or Saturn is rising to power. We become old and young in alternation. Sometimes at the same time.

Some view success as an upward climb. But that is a circle too. What goes up comes down and then up again. Some people begin life in success and end in failure. For others the reverse. We become visible & then sink back into invisibility. Or vice versa.

Some believe society progresses over time- eternally advancing in technology and humanitarian values. This progress is the work of Uranus. But he too has an opposing force- Saturn- who is always dragging us backwards and returning us to the past. Traditional roles & primitive technologies. Like what is happening in Afghanistan with the takeover of the Taliban. This backwards pull happens everywhere eventually and is just as certain as the forward pull of Uranus.

Right now, for example, Uranus is passing through Taurus– the sign of money. Crypto technology is moving forward in leaps & bounds. The financial institutions of today will soon be obsolete as power is once again democratized and returned to the people. The central overlords of money fall down & it becomes a simple matter for a poor person to get a small loan. (Btw- you should buy crypto yourself & hopefully stake with my AKLEI cardano pool!)

Meanwhile, Saturn is passing through Aquarius– the sign of social networks. At least for me, I am going backwards in terms of how I connect. The increasing censorship of big tech & social media sites like facebook had made this necessary since all my friends now rotate in and out of facebook jail on a regular basis. They have started censoring private messages as well.

So, I am trying to build up my interactive skills in other ways- learning how to use snail mail, learning how to use a phone & text, learning how to meet people in person or use email, all more old fashioned ways of connecting that don’t give you the reach of social media but do lead to more personal- and hence more solid, lasting & heavy relationships- something Saturn values.

We move forward into the future and we return to what was. One aspect of life may be progressing while another is regressing. Both movements have value.

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Forever

Lay the stars before me
Place my hand into the tray
Let me choose the one that I’ll follow
All the way.

I’ll walk until forever
Past the green plants as they die
I’ll leave them on the ground
My eyes fastened on the line.

I could live forever
It would a single day
Push me to the ground and then I’m found I’m found
Always be that way.

I could know forever
I can see where heaven lies
Walk me on and on and when it hurts again
Close my eyes.

We were walking side by side through night
Dressed from head to toe in black was I
When you felt afraid you’d turn to me
And wish that I would die.

Push me down into the blackness
Somewhere in the soil I start to live
Now I ‘m a ghost I can’t be hurt no more
Only give.

I could live forever
It would a single day
Push me to the ground and then I’m found I’m found
Always be that way.

I could know forever
I can see where heaven lies
Walk me on and on and when it hurts again
Close my eyes.

Take my hand & look into my eyes-
No you won’t
I’m your shadow now
Where you go I go.

Take my hand & try to turn me round-
No you see
I’m invisible
Your company.

I could live forever
It would a single day
Push me to the ground and then I’m found I’m found
Always be that way.

I could know forever.
I can see where heaven lies
Walk me on and on and when it hurts again
Close my eyes.