Reading Balls

Since James is asleep and I need someone to talk to, I have decided to spill my mind on you, my wise and invisible friend.

As I mentioned before, I used to begin each day with “ESP Journaling” which entailed drawing pictures of the colored balls that were (psychically) pelting me. Each ball represented a thought, emotion, or intention coming towards me or James from someone else.

As I started to get more traffic on my website, though, the number of balls grew and blended until eventually it just felt like a wall of fire surrounding my head. So I stopped the whole ESP journal thing because the energy felt too overwhelming to break apart. ESP is easiest when you are dealing with a small amount of information.

Today though, I decided to put on my purple necklace and ESP journal again, just for old times sake.

Let me share with you how it is done.

1. First, I scan my body to find the areas most under attack. Generally, this is my head. If, for example, I have recently posted something political on Facebook, my head will get bombarded. This has held me back from public sharing on many occasions, since balls to the head can be quite distracting, and -what is worse- draw your attention away from more vital interactions taking place lower in the body.

Other common ‘attack sites’ are the heart, stomach and sexual organs. The heart is generally linked to betrayal, affection, manipulation, and people trying to get stuff from you. Stomach attacks seem to relate to professional competition (people rarely direct these at me, but I pick up the ones sent to my husband.)

The sexual organs, unsurprisingly, link to sex. Sexual ESP is a world unto itself, and hopefully I will write about it at length in the future. For now, I will just say that it has radically transformed my view of life- and not for the better. I am still trying to dig beneath conventional understandings of sex though, to understand what the energy is all about. I feel like it is the key to something huge.

2. Next, I use my hands to determine the color of the energy and what it is doing. The color part is easy. Understanding what the color is doing, though, is more confusing and sometimes ties my brain in knots. The color can be moving towards you, away from you, hiding behind another color, slithering two ways at once through a metal tube, etc.

If, for example, someone is intentionally ignoring you, you will see a ball filled with color, but the color will be moving away from you to the far side of the ball. If someone is hiding something from you, the color will hide behind a gray field. If they are hiding something from themselves (trying to be unconscious of it) the color will hide behind a clear field.

Sometimes I will see clear fields coming from James when he doesn’t want me to ESP him. Unfortunately, the clear field only attracts my attention and then it is quite easy to peak behind it.

3. Next, I check to see who the energy is coming from. This can be obvious, if it is James or someone I am familiar with. But -to my own surprise- even when it is a stranger I can usually make out their gender, hair color, age range and body type. Still, to get this information I have to squint my eyes, which can feel uncomfortable, so I sometimes skip this step out of laziness.

Keep in mind that most of these balls are not revealing fascinating secrets, but rather mundane information. If someone argues with James on Twitter, for example, they will show up as a ball. In fact, there may even be a ball for each individual tweet. So once you do this enough, you start to lose your patience for squeezing your brain just to determine the hair color of the dude James tweeted at.

4. Finally, I see what other information I can glean from the balls. Generally, this is nothing more than the basic emotion being emitted. If- however- it is an area of fascination- relating to love or secrets for example- then I will sometimes look hard enough to see images forming in the colors.

But generally, I don’t take it this far, because there are so many balls to cover that I have to keep moving. I normally do my journal for about an hour and in that time can only cover a fraction of the balls available. Because every little thing that does or doesn’t happen in this world leaves a ball behind.

Of course, it isn’t just balls. Other things I might draw in my journal include:

  • Mind overlaps. This occurs when someone is thinking about you to the extent that their mind overlaps yours and you can’t think your own thoughts. I don’t know if anyone can overlap anyone else’s mind at will, or if there have to be pre-existing conditions in place.
  • Rectangle ghosts. I wrote about these before. It is my name for when a person’s whole energy system overlaps your body at once. I mostly experienced these when I did astrology readings for people, and it is the main reason I stopped. The good part is you can get a lot of information about a person. The bad part is being filled with thoughts, feelings and urges that make no sense and can sometimes be painful or destructive. Of course, once you realize it is just someone else’s rectangle ghost you gain some amount of control over the situation.
  • Poles & Barbs: Poles are used to control people and barbs are used to injure. I mostly see poles on the head and barbs at the heart.
  • People Balls: In addition to balls representing thoughts and emotions, there is a more stable set of balls which represent the various people in your life. These balls tend to stay in the same place and remain the same color. When they do change position or color, you know something has changed in the relationship. The balls of those you are look up to appear above your head, while the balls of those you relate to as children appear beneath the shoulders.

    You will also see lines coming off these balls, which show the other people each person is connecting to. So, people with whom you have no personal relationship are still showing up in your aura, just by being connected to the same people as you. These balls and lines together look a lot like drawings of molecules.

    *
    Okay, thanks for listening, friend. Sometimes I feel isolated- as though I am living in my own world. But now that you have read this, it is a world that we share. You are a ball in my mind, and I am a ball in yours.

Random page from ESP Journal. Generally I would do maybe 3 or 4 pages like this a day & it would still be a tiny fraction of everything I could have drawn.

Sometimes when things get X rated I switch to a code to preserve the chastity of all involved. Since I am kind of paranoid when it comes to secrets, the code doesn’t translate directly into a specific language. Sometimes I can’t even read it myself, since I change the language up over time. All names are blurred except for James’s, since he told me not to. He thinks I should be more transparent & less secretive.

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