Man and Bird

10 Feb
0

 

I met her on a Thursday when the clouds were so high,
and the mountains reached up like a perch for the sky.
She wore feathers the color of air;
I was crusted in callouses left by despair.Man and Bird

Though she chirruped soft sounds I could not understand,
she smelled blue as the wind and I was just a man;
so I offered her my finger as a wrinkly perch
and I carried her like sweet bride right to my church.

I felt joy descend on my cheek like a wing…
All my life I’d been searching for a woman with the blue eyes of spring!

You know, most women are so heavy always clumping their brooms
as they glare from the side of an eye filled with gloom.
I don’t like them, I don’t need them, I don’t want to say why;
but I did love this sweet bird that fell like an egg from the sky.

But gossip grew after only one week
when the maid saw me lower my lips to her beak.
I won’t deny that my mind was impure;
I fingered her soft head and I would have done more.

But I can’t have my life ending in ignominy
Though I’m old I have gold and I’ve earned every penny.
In a perfect world, she’d be my bride and help me to spend it;
instead I carried my bird inside where I knew I must end it.

Standing in the shadow of a chandelier I told her
that I would not be the man to hold her.

She looked at me through lacy eyes marbled with pain
then she flew away, my little bird, I stood there and leaned on my cane.

And it’s true that it haunts me that look on her face;
shadows flow through my heart- yes, I made a mistake.
But I’m a man, just a man- what else more can I be?
I can’t butcher myself in the press so a bird can be free!

Fly away birds, fly away; you know the spring is long gone…
there’s no seeds for you here on my manicured lawn.

Let me rest in my evening chair in the sun’s pinky glow.
Life ends in regret, that’s our world, and its always been so.

 

Download MP3: Man & Bird

Golden Fingers

27 Jan
0

 

Checker Board

The Greenbrier, West Virginia

Watch the world with hopeful eyes
staring at its black disguise
hiding-where are you?

Underneath a checkerboard
knights and kings keeping score
crying- can it be true?

Under your purple eyes
black squares and white squares lie
fighting- which one is true?

Under your aqua shirt
hope is killed off by hurt
all on the surface is blue.

Don’t lose heart whatever life brings
you must believe that behind all things
Golden Fingers pull on the strings!

Prop your head up on your arm
in your eyes I see no intent to harm
that’s why I love you.

But the day will surely come
when you will kill or be the one
whom they pour their poison into.

Don’t be their fluffy sheep
sink into places deep
let evil flow through your root.

Hardened heart, inky skull
feast like a cannibal
all of the black squares were true.

Killing hurts and killing stings
but you must believe that behind the scenes
Golden Fingers pull on the strings!

When you’re dark, when you’re mean
doing things that shouldn’t be seen
I will be here with you.

Bodies lie, angels spy
we fall to earth, one day we fly
all of the white squares were true.

In the sky they saw
your hand and they understand
you did what you had to do.

Kill or be killed they know
that’s the way black squares roll
all of their tears were for you.

Don’t lose heart whatever life brings
you must believe that behind all things
Golden Fingers pull on the strings!

 

Download MP3: Golden Fingers

The Wire

7 Jan
0

 

Goodbye to Peanut Lily, one of the neighborhood dogs who used to walk with me.

Goodbye to Peanut Lily, one of the neighborhood dogs who used to walk with me.

 

You held my hand by barbed wire
You covered my mouth trash burned in a fire
The hills rose high
No thrills, no sky

We walked the road through shack and shed
We fed the dogs some whole wheat bread
Likes fleas, like friends
Burdens that bleed, yearnings that end

You cry but all along
I knew that it was wrong
Under my breath I sang a song
I don’t belong, I don’t belong

Good morning dogs scratch at my door
Could I delay for just a moment more?
Cold air, always so gray
Always want more, carried away

Goodbye, Cotton. We will miss you.

Goodbye, Cotton. We will miss you.

You place the slippers on my feet
We watch the kids play on the street
Let’s try to have faith, let’s try to have fun
Look the kid in the stripes, he’s wearing a gun

You cry but all along
I knew that it was wrong
Under my breath I sang a song
I don’t belong, I don’t belong

I set a rock upon a log
I watched the trees dissolving into fog
Forced to remain, forced to hang on
Always the same, just expanded upon

You cry but all along
I knew that it was wrong
Under my breath I sang a song
I don’t belong, I don’t belong.

 

 

 

Download MP3: The Wire

 

He thought there must be some lines in the earth he could follow,
Hidden by snow, but he’d possibly find them in spring.
A grid made of brown that would lead to the crown of tomorrow…

Hail to the rose!
Hail to the sky!
Teach me to live;
Teach me to die.

In the snow it was cold but some hope filled his body;
Golden liquid that quickened the fire in his brain.
He had a theory the earth was surrounded by knowledge;
A shimmering library accessed by unbearable pain.

When I close my eyes- Ah!
Like a flame through my fingers it burns, like a fire through my heart.
When I close my eyes- No!
It eludes me a pain in my shoulders, a dimming echo.

Hail to the rose!
Hail to the sky!
Teach me to live,
Teach me to die.

His blue eyes scanned the skies though he knew they were empty;
Only fools look for schools where the airy birds fly.
Something told him the brown of the ground held the answers;
His desire for the fire left him willing to die.

Won’t you take me inside of your library
Prepared to hurt, lay my screams in your dirt?
Won’t you take me inside of your library
Prepared to bleed for the answers I need?

Hail to the rose!
Hail to the sky!
Teach me to live,
Teach me to die.

 

Download MP3: The Brown Library

The Golden Ring

21 Dec
0

 

1.
Up and down the stairs I ranCamels
with a scepter in my hand
How to chase the doubts out from my mind?

When the only life I’ve ever known
is to strive for absolute control
and to pull on every string that I could find

To my talismans I cling
I am scared of everything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring

2.
On my back I saw the stars
I remembered fireflies in their jars
How to pull the fire out from the flame?

Can I make the bad ones fall and
crush them into pieces small
and somehow extricate myself from blame?

In my ears are bells that ring
I will conquer everything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring

3.
Ladies dance and ladies sing
they toss their hair; they wear a ring
they don’t amount to anything I’m sure

But I will cut each finger tip
with stony eyes I’ll watch them drip
I’ll stand in puddles red upon the floor

Are there wise men- I don’t know
grow the way that flowers grow
spreading from their center like a star

If you make your peace with pain
and cool the fever from your brain
like a seed upon the wind you will go far

Sing the song that roses sing
do not believe in anything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring

4.
On my back I saw the stars
they spread out wide they were my arms
the burning flames that sparkled were my hands

I held my hands up to my face
I gazed into that burning place
so many bright things I could understand

I sing the song that roses sing
I will see through everything
He knew one day he’d grab the golden ring

 

Download MP3: The Golden Ring

 

I was intending for this song to be the last of my “Pathetiques-” those songs which express the most pathetic slice of my soul. Therefore, I took some time off from writing in the hopes of tapping into a more vigorous part of myself.

But since I spent that time painting my apartment pink and learning the daintiest of sciences, chemistry, it may be that my descent into patheticness is just beginning.

*Two Clouds

Handkerchief rests like a weight on my chest, I can’t breath, oh no
I knew from the start the things that come will go

You say you love me, but love is a word, tra la la, I know
Life floods when it comes and where it goes it goes

Restrain, I can’t breath, mind tries focusing
But what is there on which I can rely

I don’t feel love, I don’t feel real
Please don’t let them know how I feel.

Handkerchief lies like a weight on my eyes, I can’t see, oh no
I’ll come when you say come and where you go I’ll go

Hand on my chest, you gotta breath in and you must let go
But even when I gasp and wheeze the air will never flow

Faces in a blur, cold hearts, I am sure
Though their hands reach through the fog, I will demure

I don’t feel love, I don’t feel real
Please don’t let them know how I feel.

Smile girl, take your place
You knew life was a masquerade
Take a deep breath, then resume your place.

Everyone said the spring would arrive, so just wait through pain
I sat on the bench and waited for the rain

Scent of the pine, scent of the drops which on the needles lie
I waited for the thing on which I could rely

Silence is that you? Silver and golden too
Fallen on the forest floor, I walked all over you

I don’t feel love, I don’t feel real
Please don’t let them know how I feel.

 

Download MP3: I Don’t Feel Love

Pikey

17 Dec
0

 

 

Pikey, remember when we met and we kissed on a stone?Heart in a Box
We moved away, just the two of us, so far from home?

Do you remember when we wandered through the green fields together?
You held my hand, you promised you would hold it forever?

Summertime, you were there
You stood by side, shadows fell everywhere
like a dream, oh. like a dream, oh.

Gathering the hazelnuts that will help me to learn as I
Squint my eyes, far too many lies that I cannot discern

All the friends who used to play with me retreated for the season
The dreams that felt so pillowy dissolved into reason

Autumn came, gray and brown
You stood by my side as the leaves blew around
like a dream, oh. like a dream, oh.

You drew a map upon our wall showing how the land lies
You stocked up our basement with so many supplies
You made me walk through the gloomy woods for hours each day
You lit a fire, you told me you had something to say

Winter comes, don’t despair
You won’t see my face, but you know I’ll be there
like a dream, oh. like a dream, oh.

Pikey, can you hear me now, cause it’s hard to be brave?
Pikey, if I close my eyes can you see my hand wave?

People come with open arms; I don’t want to touch them
If you were here, you’d guard the door, with thick hands you’d crush them

Springtime, robin’s nest
Green shoots up again, little knife in my chest
like a dream, oh. like a dream, oh.

 

Download MP3: Pikey

Pillowman

20 Nov
0

 

You are so soft and warm, dusted with flowers
My face in the palm of your hand, I feel powerful
Tell me again that you like my soft head
I am an egg I will rest in your bed.

Hold me through nightshirts, hold me through pajama pants
Hold me so tight I am forced to give up the dance
Tie me to the bed and don’t let me escape from you
Outside it’s cold, but you are my you are my

Pillowman dance, Pillowman sing
Let me ride, let me ride in your basket that’s filled with the spring
Hope will come again, that’s what they say to me
Every green blade of grass bends down to pray for me

Filling my dreams with the scent of green fieldsSlippers
A world so soft; a world where the obstacles will yield
To a kind world, yield to a smile
A plate full of cookies will persuade luck to stay for a while

Then I’ll walk back to a world that is cold
Where the smiles and the cookies are all bought and sold
But first leave me with something I can understand
A scrap of pink flannel I’ll hide in my hand

Pillowman guard me, stand watch at my door
Comfort me when I can’t comfort myself anymore
When it hurts and they’re trying to charm me
Knock on my door with intentions to harm me

I bury my face in your pillowy skin
Breath through your pores and I feel peace descend
To my brain like a powder that fills up my nose
Is it true- everything comes and everything goes?

Just then the darkness begins to arise
Surprised to find that someone realized
That I I I I deserve to be befriended
Your hands on my heart til the day it has mended

And as the black blood seeps into my brain
Carrying the knowledge that made me go insane
Black leather images bite me with fangs
Held in your arms, I’m contorting with pangs

But Pillowman fights the past with his soft fists
Pulls out his scalpel for the pieces of evil that resist
Because I I I deserve to be defended
My tears on his sleeve for the things that have ended

Head on your heart and your fuzz fills my ears
Stroking my brain as it struggles with so many fears
I wish I knew how not to be afraid
But until then, Pillowman will be my friend.

 

Download Mp3: Pillowman

 

Hunched in a field, you sing in deep voicesPotato in a Field
The seeds and the soil of a world without choices
Take off your clothes at the end of the day
Lie down in a bed made of burlap and hay

The sun sinks, the sky pinks through your window so crude
Your feet hard, your back scarred, your stomach needs food
But you see your ancestors line up in brown
You hear their solemn songs sung in a round

Voice so low, Voices so deep
They crossed the ocean for you
They crossed the ocean so you could arrive
They never died.

Wiping your brow with the back of your brown hand
Your eyes are like horses, they run across this land
You see more than most, around corners and curves
Your heavy mind stays when the lighter mind swerves

Steady and patient, heavy and kind
Wearing brown pants made of burlap and twine
Nose to the grindstone, monks of the dirt
Callouses, sunsets, and visions that hurt

Voice so low, Voices so deep
They crossed the ocean for you
They crossed the ocean so you could arrive
They never died.

Your eyes follow time when it curves round the bend
You watch all the lighter ones run to destruction
They were mistaken, they thought life had an end
They ate all their seeds and then came to the bend

Shocked to discover the road just continued
Forced to keep marching without any food
You hear their cries and it makes your heart burn
But how can you give to them the things they must earn?

Voice so low, Voices so deep
They crossed the ocean for you
They crossed the ocean so you could arrive
They never died.

You know forever, you know eternity
As plain as the table where you sit for your cup of tea
You counsel your children to never waste seeds
Life is long, you must be strong, persist in good deeds.

You tell them to remember when they labor in the fields
To listen to the voices that sing in their ears
To those who are patient all will be revealed
Remember who you are, my sons- potatoes in a field.

Voice so low, Voices so deep
They crossed the ocean for you
They crossed the ocean so you could arrive
They never died.

 

Download MP3: Potatoes in a Field

 

I know you’re supposed to roam and run
the world is big so go have fun they sayAmerica
don’t hide away.

I know you’re supposed to give it up
sniff like a dog and fill your cup with wine
at least some of the time.

But the world is cold; it’s only for the bold
love is just a story we are told.

Though the world is wide, I’d like to stay inside
cause every time they spoke to me they lied.

I know you’re supposed to say you care
to breathe in deep and fill your lungs with air
a refreshing prayer.

Cause air is love and it fills the streets
between you and the people that you meet
so clear and sweet.

But I know they lied, they tried to come inside
only to consume the food on which I relied.

I am the bruise; I will refuse
to let them turn my armor into ooze.

Love is shy, pale and weak
it isn’t safe for love to walk these streets.

The world is big but it’s filled with lies
smiles with its mouth but never with its eyes
what a gray disguise.

The world is wide but it’s flat and square
you can run and run but you won’t find love out there
on this I swear.

Although life is long, it’s only for the strong
hiding in the corner is the place where I belong.

Because the world is cold; it’s only for the bold
love is just a story we are told.

 

Download MP3: The World Is Cold

 

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