Pine Trees Fall

11 Aug
0

 

 

The Pine Fairy grieves the death of some Pine Trees that were like family to him.

Sparks fly from the blade in my sword
Long ago your silver heart was all I could afford.

Clouds grow so grey and extend.
Long ago it seemed to me this time would never end.

Burned by the setting sun
I stood there and I watched you fall one by one.

Angels cry they fill the sky with fire
I know there must be a flame that comes from someplace higher.
White clouds come to fill the sky with rain
Oh my eyes I saw them fall their bodies ripped away.

Sparks shine from the wine in my cup
Poison me a little I can’t hold my shoulders up.

Gold shines from the cup in my hand
The end had come already but we did not understand.

Roll clouds through my mind
Carry me forever to another time.

Angels cry they fill the sky with fire
I know there must be a flame that comes from someplace higher.
White clouds come to fill the sky with rain
Oh my eyes I saw them fall their bodies ripped away.

Fire pain in my heart in my chest
Friends of mine, freshest ones, I knew you the best.

Fire pain in my brain in my mind
We walked almost forever till we reached the end of time.

Where you fell one by one
Burning gold you sparkled in the setting sun.

Angels cry they fill the sky with fire
I know there must be a flame that comes from someplace higher.
White clouds come to fill the sky with rain
Oh my eyes I saw them fall their bodies ripped away.

 

Download MP3: Pine Trees Fall

 

 

Because I’m feeling so dull, curling up in a ball;
when the lightening strikes call me.

Then I’ll come charging out of my hole
with the longest pole you’ve ever seen.
Like a man waking up from a dream.

You see I’ve held in this scream for so long
that it sucks like a serpent inside me.
A fluorescent green light and it bites
through the nights as the moon tries to hide me.

Suckles me with her blankets too thick,
milky white till I sweat and I stick
like a fucking prick.

And yet I will pull through
cause there’s things I must do and no other can do them.
I will wait in my hole till the clouds start to blow
then I’ll run right into them.

Then I’ll come back on fire like a wire
with a poisonous current inside me!
And I’ll slither and slide- never going inside
needing nothing to hide me!

A thrill I guarantee.
They will call me Electricity.

 

Download MP3: Electricity

 

 

 

Walking through flowers surrounded by thoughts of her when she was down on her knees
Wind in my hair but there’s nobody there much less somebody begging to please
Maybe tonight my wind will come
Maybe tonight the sky will unfold
Maybe tonight I will hear the words
Life is a story that’s already told, I’m told.

Clouds at my back I can get nothing back but a picture that’s turned upside down
Clouds that are pink, though I struggle to think I just twist and fall back on the ground
Maybe tonight my wind will come
Maybe tonight the sky will unfold
Capture it quick in a sack of gray
Maybe tonight I will truly be old.

A flag, a sky, a kite, a lie
A memory that fades, twisting and flying away…

Walking the path that I carved with my own feet wrapped in my own cotton cloth
Walking the path to the cliff where I stand with my staff on the edge of the drop off
I know what they say about me
I know who they think I am
And if I’m magic I don’t really know that
I know that I’m not quite a man.

Maybe tonight my wind will come
Maybe tonight the sky will untwist
Capture it quick like a flag of gray
Folded and holded with twine round my wrist.

Download MP3: The Pine Fairy Is Blasted by the Past on His Way to Capture a Saturnine Wind

This is the third song about the pine fairy, who has left behind civilization in order to become a magician.

 

 

 

Weak and alone, limping out of my home
Digging holes in a row with my hoe

Cold and inhuman you know that I am
Growing my cabbages on frozen land
Calling up screams with the touch of my hand, that’s the plan.

Someday the stars will return to their place
Someday the night will grow clear
But when the sky touched his skin, the first thing he felt was fear.

Look each way twice, then the crackling of ice
Then the reaching down deep where they sleep

I heard the stories; I hoped they were mine
Blowing like winds through the forest of pine
I drank the kool-aid, I thought it was wine at the time.

Someday the stars will return to their place
Some day the night will grow clear
But when the sky touched his skin, the first thing he felt was fear.

I heard the stories they seemed seemed so alive
Like a dancer inside of my head
I heard the words and I followed them all though
The ones who had spoke them were dead…

Crackling the dream, it began with a scream
Then the tree toppled down on the ground.

Winds circled round till direction was gone
Scrambled the stars but I had to keep on
Clutching at cabbages losing all heat in my feet.

Someday the stars will return to their place
Someday the night will grow clear
But when the sky touched his skin, the first thing he felt was fear.

 

Mp3: The Pine Fairy Loses Faith but Clings to Survival

 

 

 

The ace was overturned;
The sticks had all been thrown.
He couldn’t think of a thing that he had learned
Just from being alone.

The meat had all been eaten;
Nothing but oats remained.
So many things that life had taken away,
So few things had been gained.

Although he could not see them,
They had gathered behind the gate.
There was nothing to do now but wait.

No messages by foot;
No signals sent from birds.
The bubbles in the creek made noise
But he couldn’t make out the words.

One of his friends had lied to him and
The other friend was dead.
He didn’t feel like riding into the town
With a price upon his head.

Although he could not feel them,
They had gathered behind the gate.
There was nothing to do now but wait.

He opened books from time to time but
The words looked like a blur.
He leaned over to pet his dog and to smell
The earthy scent of fur.

Why cry? He was a man
And a man he intended to be!
But sometimes the hopelessness swept over him like a wave
And water in his eyes made it hard to see.

But, although he did not know them,
They had gathered behind the gate.
There was nothing to do now but wait.

 

Download MP3: The Arrival of the Robed Spirits

 

 

The stars and moon were calling
but he didn’t hear.
The night was cold and piney
it was clear.
He stayed inside and cried
as though somebody died.
His heart was breaking in two
on the inside.

The owls were cold and silver;
they were harsh.
Green things were fermenting
deep within the marsh.
He rested his head down,
a king without a crown.
The staff held in his hand
was made of larch.

Why did he cry?
Cause he was learning to love himself.
But why?
Because no love came from anybody else.
People say they care
but they can’t always be there.
At times it’s best to think
of something else.

The stars were going crazy
on a whim.
Tomorrow night he may be there
dancing right beside them.
But right now he is tired.
His brain is blue and mired.
The produce on his shelf
has all expired.

Why is he tired?
Because he’s learning to love himself.
But why?
Because he can’t get love
from anybody else.
He lives in a forest of pine.
His home is hard to find.
No one has knocked upon his door
in the longest time.

 

Download MP3: Introduction to the Pine Fairy

 

All the money you piled up in piles
It sparkled to me. It helped to dream.
Buttercream on your bright copper plates
I wafted it’s fragrance up to my face and I smiled.

This is a man a man a man I could love!
This is a man a man a man I could love!

In your car with the smooth leather seats.
So warm and so cream, so soft buttery.
In your house with the thick chandeliers.
They spoke and I heard. The message was clear and I smiled.

This is a man a man a man you could love!
This is a man a man a man you could love!

Late at night in your bed how those flutes seemed to play!
Late at night on your breath I could smell your champagne!

All the cushions you piled on your chairs.
I sunk down in them. I laughed like a child.
All the silk that you rolled round my wrist.
I brushed to my cheek, the rings on your fist, they were kissed.

You are the man the man I can Love!
Mommy I’ve found a man a man I can love!

 

Download MP3: A Man I Could Love

I am Nature

28 May
0

 

 

Rose. She likes the feel of your nose.
She knows that everyone knows her, chose her, sigh.
Brown. You like the feel of the ground.
To feel it blow all around you, down you, sigh.

Don’t let me slip through.
Don’t let me walk invisible by.
I am Nature; I get you high.

Green. Too many places unseen.
Too many footsteps behind you, bind you, why?
Stray. Seek everything far away.
Don’t let nobody scold you, mold you, try.

Don’t let me slip through.
Don’t let me walk invisible by.
I am Nature; I get you high.

Burn. Too many pages to learn.
Too many pages to follow, swallow, sigh.
Strive. You always fought to survive.
You always fought them to conquest, multiply.

Don’t let me slip through.
Don’t let me walk invisible by.
I am Nature; I get you high.

 

MP3 (Free): I Am Nature

Animals

16 May
0

 

 

In the woods they eat their cake
I dare not move now, move now; I sit in wait
I draw my knees up to my chest
Because I know the foods that they like best.

In the woods, they sip their tea
Their eyes dart back and forth so casually
They make their jokes at my expense
They know I’m somewhere somewhere, behind the fence.

IIIII

The night has come. The trees are black.
Do I feel fingers, fingers upon my back?
I need to run- but where to go?
Animals are the only world that I know.

IIIII

They’ll never leave; they’ll never lie
Their yellow teeth, by design
I need to run, but where to go?
Animals are the only world that I know.

IIII

They play their games upon their boards
They toss their heads, they’re growing bored.
Their weight is shifting upon their seats
I know that I should run but I also need to eat.

IIII

They’ll never leave; they’ll never lie
Their yellow teeth, by design
I need to run, but where to go?
Animals are the only world that I know.

 

Download MP3: Animals

James & I are preparing to move to a 1907 four square house in Charleston West Virginia.  There are many reasons I am excited about this.

 

  1. The house was built when Teddy Roosevelt was president. He is my favorite president since the teddy bear was named after him, and I also admire his stout personality and physique.
  2. I love Charleston. I think cities tucked between mountains with rivers running through them are the prettiest, especially when the river is crossed by blue bridges.
  3. I like the philosophy behind four square houses. In their time, they represented a rejection of showy refinement and European sensibilities in favor of something practical, hardy, and uniquely American.
  4. I am glad the numbers of my address add up to the number one. My former addresses have always added up to three.  According to numerology, living in a Number One house helps you to be more of an individual. This sounds good to me, because I have definitely become whatever the opposite of an individual is. I don’t even feel like a specific person. Just a loosely knit pile of air moving through space.

 

My obsession while living in Hurricane has been redecorating my apartment in different color schemes. It has been disturbing to notice the extent to which my patterns and interests change along with the colors, as though I have no inherent identity of my own, but am just a reflection of the walls.

Of all the color schemes I tried, my favorite was probably light pink with dark purple accents. I felt more myself in this configuration. The only downside was being slightly lazy and obsessively reading tarot cards for hours each day. Still, I learned a lot, especially about dreams. I learned that dreams are not so much windows into the inner self, as spyglasses through which you can know the things that other people are hiding from you. And if you take the time to look, you will find that people are hiding a lot from you.

 

 

So, back to being a number one. Why don’t I feel like an individual with a specific personality of my own? I don’t know, it may be a product of living in isolation for too long. Perhaps with no one to be your mirror you lose a sense of what your own face looks like. Of course, I have James, but- in addition to being a hard worker- he is a man of few words. Most of our conversations consist of me asking him a question and then smelling him to find the answer. Or that is how they use to go anyway.

Nowadays, I mostly know what is going on with him through physical sensations. For example, he will be at the office and all the sudden my stomach will start jumping up and down so I know he is upset about something. Or my head will start swirling and I’ll know he’s having trouble concentrating. If I suddenly feel like throwing up, I can be certain someone just touched his sandwich with their artificial fingernail. He hates that.

This sort of communication has limitations though. Normally, I only know what emotions he is experiencing and have to rely on him to fill in the details. Sometimes, there will be numbers flying around in the feelings, but I am not very good at understanding what numbers mean yet. For example, I might get a sudden headache surrounded by black number fours. What does that mean? I have no idea. Also, there are a few emotions I routinely get mixed up. A form of emotional dyslexia, I guess. For example, I have always mistaken suppressed rage for passionate love. This led to much confusion in the beginning of our relationship, when I would burst into to tears because I suddenly “knew” he was dying to make love to his Uncle Eddie- the lime green feeling in the air was unmistakable. And why did he fall in love with the mailman every time our mail was delivered to the wrong address?

 

 

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